Me and my mind

WARNING: this post is going to be a lot longer than most of my other ones! 

So I got an email from someone asking about the disease I keep talking about. She wanted to know what was wrong with me, so this post is about that. I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder sometimes know as manic depressive disorder when I was 15. It’s really hard to describe and whenever I try in my own words other people don't understand so I'm just going to go with the medical definition. People with bipolar disorder type 1 have had at least one fully manic episode with periods of major depression. In the past, bipolar disorder type 1 was called manic depression. There are other types but I have type 1 currently I'm having a manic episode, and I can take medication for it. I am supposed to be on medication I just never take it. I hate the way it makes me feel.

Manic episodes are so hard to describe. For me it’s so exhilarating, I have all these ideas and plans and I feel like I can do anything, my minds racing and I have tons of energy I don't need sleep or food. I feel invincible and infinitely creative (I’m an artist so I rather enjoy having endless inspiration). For other people I've been told I just seem crazy, I do ridicules things and reckless things and I can be extremely hostile. So really I’m a nuisance and a danger to the people around me when I get really manic. There different kinds of manic, some more severe than others.

Having a mental illness is difficult. I'll struggle with it for the rest of my life, and I'll always have to make the hard decision whether or not I want to be on medication. I hope this post helps people understand bipolar disorder better. And I hope people realize people with mental illnesses aren't crazy, they have a disease and need support. 

Intake:

530

Burned: 

250